compared to watever he has done for me. .. this little gift. a late vday pressie.. was seriously nothing..

Dar said he was very touched and surprised that i bought it for him...

It was.. quite an extravagant spending..

with that kind of money.. i can buy 2 coach bags...

bt it's really nothing compared to the totful gifts he gave to me during these period of time.. and his dedicated planning and surprises..

I'm always a lousy gf.. becos i dun plan... and i'm poor at giving surprises...

This is the rare time when I was thinking hw i can surprise my dear and hw I can give the gift to him..

Dear said he is not very keen to use it daily.. bt i reli wish he use it like a normal one...

tonite his msn nick is 'I have received a gift todat that I'll keep it close to my heart..'

Sweet darling... sweet hugz and sweet kisses..

everything is worth it..

and reli... its reli nothing compared to everythin u've done for me..

n finally.. i've gotten u smthing other than perfumes hehe...

Happy Belated Vday.. and Happy belated 1 Yr old! =)

extract from an uncle's email:

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the
ultimate anti-depressant.

2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Buy a lock if you have
to.

3. Buy a DVR and tape your late night shows and get more sleep.

4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My
purpose is to __________ today.'

5. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.

6. Play more games and read more books than you did in 2007.

7. Make time to practice meditation, yoga, tai chi, and prayer. They
provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.

8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.

9. Dream more while you are awake.

10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is
manufactured in plants.

11. Drink green tea and plenty of water.. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan
salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts.

12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.

13. Clear clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and
flowing energy into your life.

14. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of
the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest
your energy in the positive present moment.

15. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are
simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class
but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

16. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a
college kid with a maxed out charge card.

17. Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away.

18. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

20. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

21. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

22. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

23. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey
is all about.

24. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will
this matter?'

26. Forgive everyone for everything.

27. What other people think of you is none of your business.

28. GOD heals almost everything.
29. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

30. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will.
Stay in touch.

31. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

32. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

33. The best is yet to come.

34. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

35. Do the right thing!

36. Call your family often. (Or email them to death!!!) Hey I'm thinking
of ya! 

37. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am
thankful for __________. Today I accomplished _________.

38. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.

39. Enjoy the ride. Remember this is not Disney World and you certainly
don't want a fast pass. You only have one ride through life so make the
most of it and enjoy the ride.

40. Please Forward this to everyone you care about.

May your troubles be less, May your blessings be more, May nothing but
happiness come through your door!

to be happy...

exercise...maintain good health

be sincere to others... give them a sincere smile each time

forgive and forget

dun dwell on the past and waste ur time dwelling on unhappy things..

no one wil sympathise u for being unhappy

u r the only one who can make urself happy

be self content... stay appreciative

ur plight is not the worst in the world

the sun is always shining for u

u r the only one who can make urself happy

stay away from the materialistic world..

greed.. expectation harbour unhappiness.. dissatisfaction..

who am i to say all this?

not that i am happy..

easy to say than to be done..

things which r common sense.. but hard to convince and action

infant stage is the happiest stage of life

escapism is the alternative tool to happiness?

that by chinese is called ah q..

what is happy what is misery?

depends on individual's own interpretation

i am not the best person to say

cos i'm a victim in the unhappy world too

what is shining for me? i cant see or am i blinded?

i'm tired of this world..

no one understand what i'm saying...

bt i will stay appreciative.. cos i'm happy once before..

however the feelings of dejection r back to haunt me again..

i hope i can pull thru n be happy again..

To ppl on my msn list.. they know that i dread cny... y??

1) i have to work! sux man!

2) I have to wk till i finish my stuffs on cny eve! fxxx!!

3) I have to get cny clothes.. damnn... w my kind of figures.. it is reli reli challenging to get nice clothes... i only have a purple dress to wear.. and the purple dress seriously need accessories.. sux man.. i hate wearing those long big necklace.. arghh!

4) Spring cleaning.. sigh man.. my hse is as messy.. dirty and stuffed w lotsa gurung guni stuffs.. sighzz.. quarrelled w mum today.. seriously i dun understand y she kept all those stuffs.. and since ger ger is not staying w us these few days.. i wonder y she din take the time to clear up the mess.. sighhzz.. no more excuse.. dar dar is coming to my hse... sighzz. i reli reli scared n worried.. =(

unfortunately.. cny just secretly crept through.. 3 more days.. yes.. cny.. welcome to the year of RAT!!!

congrats to my jie jie.. she is 36 yrs old hehehe..

Before cny starts.. I have gone for 2 cny dinners..  1 w my hof mates.. which was yday at xian de lai.. and today w dar's family and relatives... i reli missed my hof mates.. and i reli miss eating xian de lai w them.. yday was a gd one.. ultimately they were joking abt my upcoming rom and wedding hehe.. bim n 5x looked sian.. i suspect they gt abit stress up w ppl ard them getting married.. hmm hmm..

ANyway today was a sweet day cos dar actually went shopping w me.. once in a blue blue moon.. although it ended within 2 hrs.. sighz man... din reli shop enuf.. bt i understand its quite unbearable for guys la.. like myself.. i prefer to shop alone one.. when i company frens to shop.. usually i dun shop for my things.. pat pat dar hehe.. lucky u ah.. jayme saw us hehe..

anyway dar.. i reli appreciate this effort fr u k cos i noe its reli unbearable for u.. hehe.. hugzzz..

Came so fast..

Yea its may turn to get married le.. like my many other frenz..

Quite surprised at the speed..

But dar proposed le.. there's no reason to reject him hehe..

So life ahead will be really eventful

We have been planning on our solemnization..

Where we decide to do it at a hotel...

Happy and excited... cos we're going to arrange appt for our shortlisted hotels... to discuss on the package..

Rendezvous... Grand Copthorne Waterfront.. Amara.. Orchard hotel...

Heheh.. reli reli excited..

Dar got me to buy the proposal ring..

hehe.. quite funny right?? bt its gd to get something I like la..

nice pretty ring.. we both love it lots..

Towards the next phase of life we're stepping into hand in hand.. there's a lot of uncertainty ahead of us.. My only worry now is money.. cos of the damn inflation and damn SOL in SG that our wages are not on par w... damn damn.. n the $$ that needs to be plunge in for a small area of living..

I hope both of us wont have to worry too much abt $$ and we wont reli spend that much too..

Anyway since the day I agreed to marry him.. dar has been reli nice to me and giving in to me.. i hope this will be lasting keke.. for myself .. i can feel the change in me.. my expectation in him grew.. i turned quite whiny and can be quite unreasonable at times cos now i expect dar to 100% pay more attention at me and pamper me more.. i know dar has been putting up w me too.. sorry dear.. i will control k.. hehe

Happiness filled my current state of life now.. I believe this is the same for dar too.. i rem him wanting to come n fetch me hm.. and when i told him not too cos of all the damn ERP charges.. he said its ok.. cos its diff now.. hehe mushy? or old fashioned? its sweetness to me.. i reli appreciate it.. =)

I wonder how life will be before and after marriage.. hehhe i rem reading xueni's comment in her frenster that its the same.. to me its uncertainty.. bt i would love to uncover bits by bits w dear.. =)

2008 is very fast-paced.. and filled with lotsa changes and surprises..

Dar suddenly mentioned abt bringing fwd our big plan by few mths to a yr..

Dar suddenly asked me abt ideal proposal period..

Dar suddenly asked me abt proposal ring..

Suddenly we're entering jewellery shops when we're slacking in our slackers n tee at IMM...

Suddenly I realised Citigem's diamond (Roselle) looks reli terrific...

Suddenly... Dar and I decided on a ring we like most..

Celestial Solitaire Diamond ring... 0.35caret, E, VVS2, Excellent Cut..

A really pretty ring..

And I suddenly realised I'm marrying soon?!!... in 1-2 yrs time.. OMG.. I am quite caught up with these changes...

A lot of things to look fwd...

Our houses..

Our ROM..

Our Photo shots..

Our Weddings...

Our Living together..

hmmmm..... ^_____^

Am I dreaming? All these came so fast that I cant help but to ask.. is this a dream???!!

^___________^ Happy happy... Hope dear wont bully me ehehe

***************************************************************************************

Niece has been screaming for the last half hour and she just started crying

wah lauz.. she reli gt a big lung

I think tonight will have a hard time to sleep

For me.. sighz

My health has paled tremendously these days.. sighzzz

Sighhzzz.. noisy... I think I reli cant tahan kids..

****************************************************************************************

MIssing missing someone now.. sighhzz... today has been an extremely long and boring day for me.. wonder what he is doing now.. sighzzz...

************************************************************

Better go check out my niece now.. ciaoz!!!

This is reli frightening!

Read HL's blog.. she's gettin married.. the proposal must be damn romantic to make her say YES.. reli happy for her..

Saw HX's frenster.. OMG!! she just given birth to a baby!!!.. omg..

SL and KS who got married last year also got pregnant!

OMG.. these are reli happy things.. seriously i reli felt happy for them...

BUT... to see ppl same age as u getting married and GIving BIRTH... this kind of feeling is... bizarre... it's a form of changes..
in the environment I am living in...

In summary... I noe.. I'm getting older... argh!!!!!!

Getting married is exp.. setting up family is exp.. giving birth and taking care of kids is also exp.. where do we find all these $$??

Savings? WHat do we have? MOst of our income are used to pay off debts.. like school loans.. car loans etc etc...
There's hardly any leftovers for savings...

I was watching this tv programme on financing.. this girl was talking abt the impt of having passive income.. which is the route towards
financial freedom.. It talks abt active income, which is the money we earn from wk.. and passive income is income you earned not from wking..
like rental income.. speculation in stocks..etc etc..

Is this how we can grow money? yes.. absolutely.. bt the risk-adverse nature me is also sending red signal down to my brain.. higher return
higher risk..

But anyway.. all these things abt $$ push me a step forward to manage my $.. My current way of handling money is to leave it in POSBank and earn
a miserable 0.3% interest..

Now.. there could be better ways.. eSaver accounts for 2.85%? (much higher than even fixed deposits).. ok not that i only know it today.. just that
I don't really apreciate it last time.. I noe it was a higher i/r last time.. yes cos i procastinate too much la.. talk but no action.

But for sure I will park my money into eSaver accounts..

Anyway I've been wrecking my mind abt my career path... the year end closing just ended last fri... had been wking like zoombie these days and reli
confirm my dislike towards long hours job.. i think it has siphoned my brain and soul away.. handicapping the working of my brain neurons and failing my memory chips..
I realise besides paying income tax.. I have no contribution to the society. I seriously hope to do something that is more worthwhile and meaningful...
I have a bold idea of wking as counsellor in prison school... however i have NO qualification!!... sadded!!!...
I may need to study meaningful courses to upgrade myself.but I reli have phobia in studying and i have no $$$!!! sighhhzzzzzz..
This job is paying me too well.. and upgrading my lifestyle.. i have to leave soon.. else it wil be reli diff to GET OUT!!!.....

Dilemma dilemma.. what have I been doing these years??!!! Whats my contribution to the world??!!?!! oh sux man...
besides entertaining and humoring my traders to make sure they are happy.. whats my achievement??!?!?!?

Seriously I'm no longer young.. I have to decide on a path soon.. but seriously i have no direction now!.. no one can help me cos i shld be the one who
jolly noe what I want.. but but.. reli I hv neither the clue nor courage..

I yearn for work life balance.. I yearn for simplicity in life.. getting married.. have a hubby to dote on me.. and not nasty numbers and IT issues to deal w all the time!
And now I dun even have any hobby!. pathetic! real pathetic! sighhzzzz

que sera sera.. what will be will be~..

There are many things I hope to achieve in 2008..

1) Improved love - improve each other's understanding.. less quarrels.. more hugz... more long hours of chats.. more defined goal to work towards...

2) Frens - HOF can be closer or as close.. more outings... more keeping in touch.. less soreness.. n keeping in touch w twin.. liling... peie.. hongli.. kw etc...

3) Family - Spend more time w family.. be understanding.. less quarrels.. more filial..

4) Health - Be healthy.. eat more fruits.. drink more water.. less salt less oil... weight loss.. go for lasik (i reli reli hope so).. do more masks n facial.. stay pretty

5) Career - Get out of current job.. find out what i reli like to do... have the courage to do what i like..

6) Wealth - Be thriftier..

7) Social - Be more open, approachable..

Be happy and bring happiness to all

SImple resolutions??? I just want to be happy thats all..

2007 report card:

Career: 6/10

More work.. more responsibility.. more stress.. more complaints.. more wrinkles.. less time..

though more $$

But so whats good abt $$? seriously its reli no big deal

Just give me a fair share of work and resp and don't make me work like a manager when i'm not the 1 who got promoted .. be fair

Love: 8/10

Good good... I got a HIM who made me believe in love again

A HIM who makes faith and trust impt to me

A HIM who dun give a damn at my nonsense (gd or bad?)

A HIM I have full trust in..

However we do quarrel quite a fair bit..

Our characters r actually quite different

However I believe in Adapting and Changing

Health: 4/10

Bad bad. Sometimes I reli think I'm dying soon

Eyesight getting worser

Put on my weight

Skin turns drier and worser

Stress messing up my hormonal cycle

Sighhing make me feel aged

Memory failure

Blur and sleepy always

Sighhzz

Frens: 4/10

Sighh its a FAIL

Frenship disappoints me most

A long distant frenship.. I hold on to the faith.. I lent my ear... I spent the nites calling her for chat instead of sleeping.. I bothered to go source for her things..

I listen to her whines and complaints.. I tolerate w her insensitivity towards me

But there's nothing i got back in the end.. only disappointments

this is what I called.. Untrue frenship.

I look ok now... bt i noe i am not..

I hate putting faith in frenships. this is the 2nd most disappointing frenships i have

I gave up totally.. the feeling of bein taken for granted is reli reli bad

I can still feel the pains... serious..

SIghz.. I hope i can forget u

Can I trust frenship again??

Family: 5/10

Girl girl grows up each day.. getting taller.. brighter.. she always amazed and make me damn happy w her cuteness.. her attempt to pronounce some words...

SHe is the angel of my family.. the angel of bonds.. she brings in laughter.. happines.. and of cos.. wailings..

Yes.. she caused many nites of insomnia in me too

She makes me realised how great my parents r.. poor them having to sacrifice their sleep to take care of her

I realised my parents have aged.. sighhh.. but i haven been able to spend meaninful time w them

I'm very guilty on this..

SIgjh

dar told me that there's no such thing as honeymoon period for both of us.. its for those young kids..

i agreed.. bt at the same time was not very happy then.. why am i deprived of this experience ma?!!! hehe.. bt nw.. come to think of that.. its actually quite fei la.. he is just like this.. direct.. no faking. therefore he is the true one right from the start.. no false hope.. no fake expectation.. real and good.. =)

was raining a young girl's blog just now.. her name is queenie.. dar's cousin's gf.. was reading the sweet little stories bet both of them.. etc etc.. and also on the quarrels and misunderstandings they have... heee such stories made me reflect abt my own r/s... i love reading stories.. grin!!